When It Rains…

By Martin Baena

Characters: 1, 2

Setting: A bus stop

Lights on. 

1 and 2 hold up umbrellas as they wait for a bus.

1: That it?

2: Wait a sec’, wait a sec’…

1: Is it coming?

2: (squinting) I dunno… no… no, doesn’t look like it…

1: Gotta be it.

2: No, not it.

1: Shit. (Pause)  I’m an affable person..Right?

2: Huh?

1: I feel like I am the right amount of affable. You can be too affable – yes? – and not affable enough. I’m just affable.

2: Okay.

1: It suits me.

2: You say you’re affable but…

1: What?

2: ..but you’re not. Your the opposite; you’re an anus.

1: Awright…

2: Well, somebody had to say it.

1: …awright-awright…

2: Someone had to bring this… this…

1: Seriously…

2: …nonsense to an end.

1: It’s not funny.

2: It’s not funny.

1: No.

2: I didn’t want to be the one to tell you…

1: Not one bit funny.

2: …but no one else was going to. Goddamn you have to be a moron not to realize it. A real fuckin’-idiot-sonofabitch not to get it.

1: I got it. I got it. Thank you… thanks. (Pause) I’m not sure you know what affable is.

2:  Sorry you had to hear it from me.

1: Oh, sorry. Okay. Sure.

2: No, really. I’m sorry but…

1: You were dying to say it.

2: That I take pleasure in sayin’ it…

1: There, there it is!

2: …that has nothing to do with the, the…

1: It has everything to do…

2: …the truth of what was said.

1: …everything…

2: No.

1: …to do with it.

2: …no, no.

1: Here’s the bus. – Thank christ.

2: It’s a garbage truck.

1: Y’ don’t know what your talkin’ about.

2: It had to be said. It needed sayin’…

1 pushes 2 into the road: loud honk, skidding. Crash

1: It had to be done. It needed doin’…

Lights down.

Creative Commons License
This work by Martin Baena is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.


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